:: :: :: :: :: [ WebGoddessCathy ] :: :: ::

				WebGoddessCathy [don't kid yourself]	[talk to me]

BLOG

> archives
> site feed

<-- my life, by webgoddesscathy -->

:: Saturday, March 12, 2005 ::

Is there anything better on a Saturday morning than homemade bread, fresh out of the over (erm, breadmaker) drenched in butter?

OK, let's not mention that steaming cup of rich strong coffee from, let's say, The Coffee Roaster in Sydney.

I really miss that lovely crema atop the first flat white of the day. I haven't found a single place in Toronto that comes close. All the best coffee shops were in Australia. Adelaide and Perth were my favourites, actually.

Does anyone know of a truly great cup of coffee in Toronto?

I've tried JetFuel, but it's totally overrated. There's supposed to be someplace in Kensington Market, but I've yet to find/try it. Maybe I should make that my quest today.

You know, when I was travelling, somedays that WAS my quest: find the best coffee in the city. Sometimes I succeeded. And somedays I had to settle for Gloria Jeans or, worse, Charbucks.

Actually, I think Charbucks might be better in North America. Maybe it's because I've been drinking the Chantico lately... oh my GOD, have you TRIED the stuff? Melted chocolate in a cup! SINFUL! But it can be a challenge to finish a whole one by yourself, even given the mini-cup they serve it in. It's that rich.

Anyone tried any of the following and wanna comment:
Fresh Start Coffee Co (Bay/Elm)
Merchants of Green Coffee (sold at Matilda St. and Yummy Baguette on Queen)

:: Cathy 9:38 AM [+] :: 0 comments

:: Friday, March 11, 2005 ::

It's difficult to take a day off work.
Staying home today, I probably did almost a full-day's work.

Although, unlike work, I was able to make myself Pillsbury crescent rolls for breakfast and scrumptious spaghetti with meat sauce and whole wheat noodles for lunch/dinner to try to make myself feel better. From what I can taste, i am a good cook! Kendra would be proud: lots of garlic!

Also unlike work, I was able to get home at a reasonable time, so I can finally work on Anita's website.

And thanks to the Robaxicet/Robaxisal-type drugs I've always scoffed at, I can sit without wanting to cry.

NO THANKS to stupid JetsGo going bankrupt, I've also had to deal with getting new flights for me and my mom to Calgary for April 1st. And WestJet makes this big press release about how they're going to really BE there for the POOR JetsGo passengers -- and then they turn around and RAISE their prices! I paid double the price! I'm paying almost the same to go to Calgary for a week as I am to go to the Netherlands for 2 weeks!

Oi, do I hate the stupid airlines.
I am totally sending them mean thoughts for making my sick day even worse!
TAKE THAT!

And now I'm going for a soak in the tub, thanks to inspiration from Raye, who is also sick :(

:: Cathy 4:51 PM [+] :: 1 comments

:: Thursday, March 10, 2005 ::

Well, at least I'm not the only one who has problems with the roommates not putting my stuff back in the frige. I discovered a blog today "Things I hate about my flatmate" that made me giggle. I, too, had to put a note on the Brita saying "If you use my Brita, please refill and place back in the fridge."

Sounds bitchy? But I said thanks!
But I was always coming home to my empty Brita, lying forlornly on the kitchen counter BESIDE the fridge. Kinda thoughtless, dontcha think?

Well, now I know I'm not that bad off.
At least they put their own milk in the fridge.

Although they never take the garbage out. Seriously, they MIGHT have done it once. I tried leaving it to see if they'd actually do something about it. No such luck. It was falling onto the floor and smelling of rotting garbage when I finally took it the 5-second walk down the hall to the garbage shute where we have to pass by EVERY SINGLE DAY on our way out of the apartment.

It's OK if they read this. Maybe then they'll take the garbage out.

:: Cathy 5:25 PM [+] :: 0 comments

My body has decided it's not going to take it anymore.

It attacked me with a cold, complete with drippy nose, sore throat, draggy body feeling - take THAT! Not content with that, it decided I might need a migraine to remind me what REAL pain is. HA! That'll show me! And finally, let's top it off with some good old fashioned back spasms. Great, now she can't bend, take big steps, or sit down or even sleep comfortably! Who needs sleep anyway?

Well, what did I expect, stressing it out all the time? Poor body! It's been getting ready for the big wave to hit, adrenalizing itself so it's ready to run for the hills. And I've faked it out once too many times. It knows that the so-called-emergency situation is a more permanent situation that I'd been leading it to believe. And it's saying "screw you, buddy."

And so it did.

:: Cathy 5:20 PM [+] :: 0 comments

:: Cathy 4:58 PM [+] :: 0 comments

:: Tuesday, March 08, 2005 ::

It seems to me that I freak out with some regularity. I'm not sure exactly what happens. One minute, I'm calm, with perspective on my life. The next minute I'm overwhelmed, panicked and snapping at everyone.

How does it happen?

It seems to have a 2- to 3-week cycle.
So it's not JUST hormones, if that's what you're thinking.

Am I crazy? Do I suck at my job?
Can I not handle stress?
These are the fears I deal with.

So I spend my 10-plus-hours at the office and I organize. And I put together schedules, send emails, update budgets, write status reports. All in the quiet of an empty building.

And finally, I am sane. I can breathe that sigh of relief. Press send, sign off, click off the lights, lock the doors, set the alarms.

Head off to another night of barely enough time to make some dinner, check my email, blog, and brush my teeth before bed.

:: Cathy 7:19 PM [+] :: 2 comments

:: Monday, March 07, 2005 ::

Oh great. Now the fire alarm is going off. God, I love it here.

:: Cathy 7:20 PM [+] :: 0 comments

"It seems to me that, when you were in Australia, you blogged a lot more about how you felt about things."

I might have blushed if I weren't so sad about it.

I know it to be true. And I also lament it. But it's not something you can force.

I shrugged. "I had more time to think about it."
And I mean that in every sense.

More time to think about what I was doing. More time to think about how I felt about it and the people around me and consider how things affected me. I had more detachment from everything as it unfolded like a story around me. I had the sense that I had to remember it all very clearly or it would all get away from me; that if I didn't document every chance conversation, every slant of sunshine, every splash of wave, it would be like it had never happened.

I was obssessed. Even in the midst of a great experience, I was thinking about how I would write about it.

And then I actually had the lulls. When I didn't speak to anyone. When I didn't have to clean the bathroom or visit a friend or finish that big project. When there was really nothing else to do but think about things that had happened. And think about why they mattered. And ponder the correct choice of wording.

Writing takes time.
Good writing takes time. And a sense of inspiration pulled from everything around you.

And these are two things that I fall consistently short of these days.
To the detriment of something I love very much.

:: Cathy 6:59 PM [+] :: 0 comments