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				WebGoddessCathy [don't kid yourself]	[talk to me]

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<-- my life, by webgoddesscathy -->

:: Saturday, August 12, 2006 ::

Weekends.

That great non-working time when all the cool people do cool things.

Weekends, chez Cathy: work late on Friday just so you can bike home (after the bike repair shop is closed - grr), water the plants, do laundry, change the bed sheets, resand and restain the banister. Make quick plans for Saturday as your boyfriend has ditched you for the weekend.

Saturday, wake up as early as you normally do, try to sleep in unsuccessfully. Watch terrible episodes of home improvement shows while drinking a smoothy (OK, that part was pretty damn good) and think about whether to ride your bike to the distillery district for the dance festival or whether you can drop it off at the bike shop and walk that far.

Water more plants, do more laundry, admire the banister now that it has non-defective stain on it. Freeze inside while you debate how you're going to go about your day in the sunshine.

OK, that's it. I'm OUT of here!

:: Cathy 8:21 AM [+] :: 0 comments

:: Friday, August 11, 2006 ::

So there I am, volunteering at an AIDS Conference-affiliated event at MaRS last night.

I'm volunteering as the photographer's assistant and writing down the names of everyone in the photos he's taking.

Click.
"Can I take down your name for the photo credit?"
Click
"Can you please spell your last name?"

And so on.

Valerie Pringle's there, Olivia Chow and Barbara Hall. There's the speaker of the evening, Dr. James Orbinski. And the man with the million-dollar cheque. And all I can do is wait because I know She is here.

Sarah McLachlan. I was there for her soundcheck and took some blurry photos from the mezzanine. It hardly seemed real.

And now I'm being asked to join the photographer as he waits for Sarah to exit from her dressing room or the bathroom. So I'm fiddling with my camera. I look up and She is there, looking me right in the face.

Dear God.
I smile.
This is so unreal.

But she's walking past me before I remember the camera in my hand. I join the entourage, tailing my photographer. I step into the elevator with everyone.

I cannot stare. And I can't start snapping photos in her face. How rude. I am not rude. So I try to be normal.

Except I am not normal. My heart is hammering in my chest. It's like that feeling I used to get around that boy I had a crush on.

And do you think I can say ANYTHING? Not a peep.

I can't think of anything intelligent.

"I love you" is not right. "I love your music" seems silly. And really, there is no opportunity. I have no reason to speak to her. Except to gush and make a fool of myself.

But she is pretty and she laughs and is normal as we walk backstage.

As she greets James Fraser, the CEO of Dignitas, the medical humanitarian organization that is the reason for this event, I start snapping. It seems somehow less intrusive, as I am supposed to document the evening, along with the professional beside me.

It is all happening so fast. The show will be starting. I am ushered to the front of the stage. She comes out and I snap more photos. Mostly blurry. And I sing along to the four songs she chooses.

I wish she would notice.

God, I am a silly teenager.

Finally, it is over and we clap and she goes back to her room. The photographer is invited to the VIP party and of course I must go with him. This is where Sarah will greet all of the important people.

I have another chance!
To do what, I'm not sure.

But she arrives and smiles and hugs people and shakes hands and talks to various people and poses for photos. The professional takes all the photos now. I dutifully write down names.

And I do not speak to her.
Or get my photo taken with her.

And she leaves and it is done. My job over. I will never get another chance like this. But really, what does it matter? What good would it do to tell her that I, like so many, like her music? That I have all of her CDs (but one)?

She would smile and inwardly roll her eyes and think, "oh god, another one" and maybe say "thank you" and that's about it.

So really, it's probably best that I have said nothing.

I wish I really felt that. But I head to the open bar to forget. Normal life resumes.

I would post my photos of her but I have signed an agreement that I will not do so unless it is approved by her management. And so I have nothing but a silly uncomfortable memory.

:: Cathy 1:03 PM [+] :: 1 comments

:: Thursday, August 10, 2006 ::

Today is Miracle Treat Day - the day to buy a blizzard at DQ! Buy a blizzard to support your local Children's Miracle hospital.

Seriously, do you need a BETTER reason to buy a blizzard?

:: Cathy 11:55 AM [+] :: 0 comments

:: Tuesday, August 08, 2006 ::

What a gorgeous weekend!

Sadly, I was in a car for most of it, but it was great.

I went with my parents to visit my grandmother. I haven't seen her since Christmas, I think, so it was great to talk to her. It really makes me appreciate everything about youth - my eyesight, my hearing, my energy and mobility. I'm really very lucky.

On our way home, we went blueberry picking - YUM, blueberries are my favourite! I've never been blueberry picking before. It was so easy. Picking strawberries is back-breaking work as the plants are so close to the ground. I thought that blueberry bushes were too - not true! They're like trees! And just packed with the bright blue clusters of berries.

So, of course, we had blueberry pancakes.

We visited Matt and Kendra and had dinner with them. We talked about all of their wedding plans and their honeymoon. It's the first time I ever heard my brother talk about having kids. Eery.

Monday, my mom and dad and I had lunch together (aforementioned blueberry pancakes) before my mom drove me back to Toronto.

I love it when she drives me because she's always so eager to get stuff accomplished. First, and most important, we went to Dairy Queen (although the Georgia Mud Fudge Blizzard that I had wasn't very good). We went to Home Depot and bought a ceiling fan and a screen door (although the screen door didn't fit in our trunk, so we had to return it and then found out that we couldn't order it online either!). We had a coffee. We went to Canadian Tire to return something and then spent the store credit on 40%-off perrenials from their Garden Centre. What a deal!

After dropping me off and unloading everything, she loaded up the car with all the things I needed to send home. Then I broke a beer bottle in my basement and she helped me clean up that mess too. Which meant washing the entire basement floor, pretty much.

When she left, I kept the momentum up. I did laundry, folded, put away clothes. I cleaned. I finished the planter on my front deck (filled with my cheap plants!). I took the garbage out. I unpacked some of Alex's boxes.

I felt so productive!

I even read all of the flyers as I relaxed and cooled down on my front porch.

It would have been a great night, had I been able to fall asleep! Instead, I was wide awake until well past 2am. And woke up with the garbage truck before my alarm at 7am.

But I rode my bike in to work - thankful that the heat wave has passed. And I just got back from a dim sum lunch with my Mom and Kendra and her maid of honour, Dana.

It is NAP TIME!

I'm looking forward to the end of the work day so that I can reconnect with my mom so we can go shopping for birthday presents and shoes/jewelery for her wedding outfit. I LOVE shopping for other people!

:: Cathy 9:09 AM [+] :: 0 comments