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<!-- July 7, 2003 -->

1:30pm. Coffee Roaster, Surry Hills

Laughter is "the weapon of the weak - you laugh at the things you don't like but don't have the power to change."
Etgar Keret

I found this passage today after finishing work at Melograno. It's such a strange place, Melograno. So nice sometimes and so bizarely, confusingly mean at other times.

But I am of the opinion that everything happens for a reason. And maybe that job is to teach me to laugh at the things I'm too powerless to change. In the past, I spent to much time fretting about things I cannot change: mistakes I've made, what people think about me, the weather.

These are things that I should learn to laugh about - because feeling bad about them only makes ME feel bad. It certainly doesn't help anything.

When people are mean to me, the only weapon I have against it is laughter. If I don't care, then they hold no power over me. Only when I react with anger or sadness do I play into their game.

"The power of the weak, who... are impotent in the grand scheme of things... try to control others as they themselves are controlled."

When I laugh, I am refusing to be controlled. Even just recognizing that they are in fact weak and powerless helps me to see the futility and humour in their attempts at controlling me.

It will help me be and stay happy.

I just need to remember that I can take the power back with this single thought.

I am in control of me.

Their attempts to control me just underline their weakness.